Any other Phineas and Ferb fans out there? Haha! "Monday! Monday!! Monday!!!"- Isabella 😂
Anyway-- Hi sweet friends! :) I am going to be sharing some updates for anyone curious and to document where God has us right now. :) This first one is all about where I'm at with epilepsy and what's coming soon for our family in this area. In the next post I will be sharing an update about my journey living with sexual assault and overcoming it and how the Lord is restoring. The third post will be my story of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and where I'm at/how things are going in this season. There will definitely be more updates because a lot has been happening around here. I always want to share and be open, as well as documenting this journey for myself and so others can see and be reminded of the goodness of God! Much love and I hope these posts bless and encourage you!
Anyway-- Hi sweet friends! :) I am going to be sharing some updates for anyone curious and to document where God has us right now. :) This first one is all about where I'm at with epilepsy and what's coming soon for our family in this area. In the next post I will be sharing an update about my journey living with sexual assault and overcoming it and how the Lord is restoring. The third post will be my story of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and where I'm at/how things are going in this season. There will definitely be more updates because a lot has been happening around here. I always want to share and be open, as well as documenting this journey for myself and so others can see and be reminded of the goodness of God! Much love and I hope these posts bless and encourage you!
Let's talk Epilepsy first. For those of you who are new to my story, here is the super short, nutshell version: I was diagnosed with Chronic Juvenile Myoclonic Epilepsy (I know, it's a mouthful;)) right before my thirteenth birthday. I have been tonic clonic seizure free for FOUR YEARS! Praise the LORD! So grateful! But epilepsy is SO much more than just seizures! Epilepsy is so invasive and broken and full of heartache. Chronic means it's forever (unless the Lord has other plans, but friends, I am so super grateful and happy either way!). I truly love this journey, and all of the many ways the Lord has blessed me and my family through this are incredible! I am so grateful! On the other hand, though, I am just six years in and I'm already losing my mind and falling apart. Every day (at least in this season, for sure!) seems so hard and completely draining. It's like a never ending river of hard. I have said several times over the years (and even more so in the last couple) that I just feel like giving up, throwing in the towel, and not fighting anymore. BUT GOD!! He is truly so good! I'm in awe of His faithfulness and the way He works and who He is!! He has never let me give up! He has always strengthened and sustained me! He has renewed and encouraged me. He has loved me so graciously and so gently! He knows me better and His ways are so much better, higher, bigger, and so, so wonderful! He has taught me so much as I have broken, fallen, and failed! He has redeemed so generously and so graciously! He has lead me to pray more deep and bold. I have learned that He is the only strength I have; it's not me and Him, it's ALL Him!! He has literally kept me alive (and you, too, friend!:)) and been the breath in my lungs! It's not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but He is good. Right now I'm in a rough valley-- I think I'm worse maybe than I've ever been, at least in some areas. I have had to and am still working on making some pretty big decisions-- I didn't think this was going to be my life. I never imagined that I would be here. BUT! God is still so good and He is ever true to His gracious promises! He truly is faithful and He restores! Praise the Lord!
Three things. One: I have a doctor's appointment coming up in just eight days (when I'm writing this) and it's freaking me out, y'all! I would so appreciate your prayers! We are going to be talking about a lot of hard things and possibly making some hard decisions along with just the normal appointment anxiety and we are nervous to say the least! Jesus is for sure teaching us and sustaining us and giving us strength and I'm so thankful for His abundant mercies!
Two: This week I have had to discuss Power of Attorney papers and the need for them, had to decide who I would put down, write the hardest letters, and ask these precious people if they would be willing to take this responsibility. That's not all, folks! There's been even more! It has been a long and SUPER hard week! I have cried so much and felt like I was going to cry SO much! Trying to make decisions in case something were to happen and trying to talk through the possibilities and what I would want and just all the things, it's been so hard! *The main reason we are doing this is so Mom and Dad can have access to all my medical stuff, etc. No matter the reason trying to plan for when you're dying at eighteen is stinking HARD (it's hard no matter how old you are 😥)!! I can't even express the pain in my heart this week! There have been so many tears and so much heartache! Prayers would be SO appreciated! We still have more of this process to go and I still have tears in me so prayers that I would just sit back and watch the Lord work and glorify Him in this valley and that I would let myself walk through the grieving instead of around it would be amazing! Thanks, sweet friends! ♥️
Three: I'm getting a wheelchair! Y'all, more tears. I just can't stand up or walk sometimes. I don't need it all the time right now, but when I need it, I *really* need it! So when we go to the grocery store, when there will be lots (for me, my lots;)) of walking or standing for long periods of time, or if there will be limited or no seating somewhere-- wheelchair! It's all going to be fine. I'm making it! Praise the Lord! Again, HE IS THE ONLY REASON WHY I AM MAKING IT!! It's ALL Him! He is so gracious to take such good care of and sustain me!! There are other big things we are praying over and asking the lord to provide if its His will and we are trusting Him. I have definitely fallen short in this at times, but He is leading and convicting me! He is so trustworthy!
If you have any questions you can DM me on IG or comment down below and I'd love to answer them!
Thank you so much for your love, support, and encouragement! Also, if you have given me hugs-- thank you! ("I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs" haha! Me in a nutshell...just kidding 😂)
xoxo,
bk
Three things. One: I have a doctor's appointment coming up in just eight days (when I'm writing this) and it's freaking me out, y'all! I would so appreciate your prayers! We are going to be talking about a lot of hard things and possibly making some hard decisions along with just the normal appointment anxiety and we are nervous to say the least! Jesus is for sure teaching us and sustaining us and giving us strength and I'm so thankful for His abundant mercies!
Two: This week I have had to discuss Power of Attorney papers and the need for them, had to decide who I would put down, write the hardest letters, and ask these precious people if they would be willing to take this responsibility. That's not all, folks! There's been even more! It has been a long and SUPER hard week! I have cried so much and felt like I was going to cry SO much! Trying to make decisions in case something were to happen and trying to talk through the possibilities and what I would want and just all the things, it's been so hard! *The main reason we are doing this is so Mom and Dad can have access to all my medical stuff, etc. No matter the reason trying to plan for when you're dying at eighteen is stinking HARD (it's hard no matter how old you are 😥)!! I can't even express the pain in my heart this week! There have been so many tears and so much heartache! Prayers would be SO appreciated! We still have more of this process to go and I still have tears in me so prayers that I would just sit back and watch the Lord work and glorify Him in this valley and that I would let myself walk through the grieving instead of around it would be amazing! Thanks, sweet friends! ♥️
Three: I'm getting a wheelchair! Y'all, more tears. I just can't stand up or walk sometimes. I don't need it all the time right now, but when I need it, I *really* need it! So when we go to the grocery store, when there will be lots (for me, my lots;)) of walking or standing for long periods of time, or if there will be limited or no seating somewhere-- wheelchair! It's all going to be fine. I'm making it! Praise the Lord! Again, HE IS THE ONLY REASON WHY I AM MAKING IT!! It's ALL Him! He is so gracious to take such good care of and sustain me!! There are other big things we are praying over and asking the lord to provide if its His will and we are trusting Him. I have definitely fallen short in this at times, but He is leading and convicting me! He is so trustworthy!
If you have any questions you can DM me on IG or comment down below and I'd love to answer them!
Thank you so much for your love, support, and encouragement! Also, if you have given me hugs-- thank you! ("I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs" haha! Me in a nutshell...just kidding 😂)
xoxo,
bk
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